Unhappy New Year

I hate New Year! There I’ve said it.

No, hang on, hate is too strong a word. But I really don’t like it. For all sorts of reasons. The overpriced taxi fares, the fake bonhomie, the soul withering hangover the following morning. All these memories from my past cause me to break out into a cold sweat. This post, however, is about New Year much as I dislike it so I’m not going to focus on the past. Call it one of my New Year Resolutions ha!

Everywhere I look people are making resolutions. They’re going to eat less, exercise more, save the planet, yadda yadda yadda. I’m sure all these declarations are well intentioned and heartfelt at the time but, let’s face it, how many of them last beyond January 7th. By then most of us, myself included, have fallen off the wagon in spectacular fashion, and can only sit on our bruised backsides and egos, watching it roll on into 2018 without us.

This makes us more unhappy than when we started out. For in order to make a resolution you have to be unhappy or dissatisfied with some aspect of your current situation. You are resolving to make a change, to improve your circumstances, to move forward. Yet when the resolution invariably crashes and burns you find yourself more unhappy than when you started. You consider yourself as weak and a failure. Your resolve has dissolved and you haven’t evolved.

You’re back to square one. Make yourself comfortable and take in your surroundings as this is where we spend a good part of our lives. Maybe eat another mince pie while you reflect on what a useless human being you are. Except you’re not. It’s the New Year Resolutions which are useless. You build yourself up all December for this chance, this hope to turn your life around in 2018 only to fall flat on your face at the first hurdle. New Year Resolutions well and truly suck.

This propensity to fail sets us off on entirely the wrong mental footing. New Year and I’ve already flunked out. Just like last year and the year before. By striving to change and move forward we find ourselves ruminating on the imperfections of our past. Which kind of defeats the whole point of the exercise. You sit there with your head in your hands thinking you have to wait another twelve months before you can try again to get a foot on the bottom rung of whatever ladder you are hoping to scale. Right?

Wrong. Why wait a year or a month or a minute for that matter? If I ruled the world (a disturbing thought I know) I would do away with New Year. Who says you can only make resolutions on 1st January. Why not 2nd January, 3rd January or 18th October for that matter. Any day, hour or minute that you choose. Change is a constant process, a state of mind that should run through your veins 24/7/365 not just once a year. So what if you screw up on 2nd January. Dust yourself down and try the next day and the day after that.

Change requires determination. Old habits need broken and new ones formed. That doesn’t happen overnight. It takes time. Transformation is a life long process. Do not allow yourself to be defined or confined by your perceived failings on a set, pre-determined day of the year. Every defeat is actually a victory. You learn more about yourself, where you learn from what went wrong the time before and then tweak and tailor your tactics in order to make sure you don’t repeat the same mistake the next time you try. For there will be a next time.

And a next time, and a next time, until it sticks and you nail it. Rome wasn’t built in a day. Or New York, Paris or Belfast for that matter. They are living, breathing cities which continue to grow to this very second. They are works in progress, as are you. Beautiful creations with a plan and a purpose greater than the sum of all your broken resolutions put together. Make your life one of constant resolution.

For within every resolution lies the solution. To unlock the person you were born to be.

Unhappy New Year everyone! Happy New Rest of your Life!!

Have you a track record of broken resolutions?

What are your 2018 goals and targets?

60 thoughts on “Unhappy New Year

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  1. Great post! I have to say, I do love New Year though. I have a thing for diaries and calendars and really enjoy setting goals for the year ahead. I think that as long as you can be realistic and kind to yourself, New Years resolutions are fine.
    Blessings,
    Hayley ๐Ÿ˜Š

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I love the post but I like New Year eve.weather is at home just in two or with friends company.i gave up New Years resolution I donโ€™t even remember how many years ago….whatโ€™s the point.i never did stick with them.but I like to think at every new year as a new start or simply one more year of the good I had so far.๐Ÿ˜ŠIโ€™m a hopeless positive person as my husband says๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜œ๐ŸŽ‰

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  3. Your comments are right on. Itโ€™s been my experience that when people are waiting around for a certain date or time (like New Yearโ€™s), the behavioral change doesnโ€™t happen. Everything that I have been able to quit (Smoking, drugs, drinking), I didnโ€™t wait till Monday, or until I finish this pack, etc. The same is true about starting things like excercise and dieting. Those who wait always find another reason to wait when that time comes around. On the other hand, New Years Eve and Day are my favorite Hollidays for several other reasons. First of all, Christmas is and the holiday season is finally over, and the stress caused by these holidays has deeply entrenched bad memories. I struggle emotionally starting in the Fall until the end of the year, but New Years it like Iโ€™m getting over the hump. Things start calming down. I love that. Plus, just like dawn, I love the idea of a fresh start. Loved hearing your thoughts. Great post

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  4. I like resolutions. During any time of the year. But on these days I just like to celebrate that I got a reminder to make new plans. To find new goals. Try a new start. Give it another go. Even if it is losing weight. I don’t ever give up resolutions. I often take a break and try again later. Don’t be grumpy for not seeing the sense in finding lame resolutions on this day. I get the feeling this is part of old Stephen and not blogging Stephen. Celebrate the start of something new. And send a picture of that beard will ya. ๐ŸŽ…๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ™

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  5. I really enjoy the idea of trying to start new. I love the idea of goals and working on changes for the better. I guess I don’t look at it as negative because making mistakes is part of life, and I’ve accepted this. ๐Ÿ™‚ You’re right, we can work on any day. I have had a couple of different days throughout this past year I’ve worked on changes, and I think it’s good to do this. I agree we shouldn’t be focused on only one day. I don’t like the word resolutions because, yes, I feel that’s associated during one time of the year, and I don’t like that. I like goals, dreams, hopes, and ambitions.

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  6. You have a brilliant way of turning cliches on their heads! I love it. And yes… I think the whole resolution thing can set us up for tremendous disappointment. Much better to set ongoing goals… to pray about the areas that we wish God to change in us… but not to “resolve” as that seems to place all the impetus on us… and I know that I’m personally very imperfect and my ship is likely to run aground. Love your blog and am looking forward to what you will write in 2018!

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  7. I have always been horrible at keeping New Year’s resolutions so I’ve decided not to put too much pressure on myself! I still always like to take some time to reflect on the past year and think of things I would like to work on. But life is always a work in progress so I don’t stress too much about setting a huge list of goals on January 1st ๐Ÿ™‚

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  8. Totally agree. Another bang on observation piece of writing. New year is overrated majorly. People get swept up by the hype and hysteria of one night of the year. Nobody knows the path they will take from one day to the next so like you say. So why not make the resolution whenever you feel at your strongest thinking the clearest this can happen anytime. I personally have goals and targets which i need to get to this year….The sooner the better ideally but whether it will happen or not is another question.

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  9. Great post! I find that I always accomplish more and have more gratitude for what I’ve accomplished when it isn’t being weighed down by the expectation of resolution. It is just growth, progress, living life, being human.

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  10. I have so many broken resolutions, past failures, itโ€™s not worth counting. Thatโ€™s why this year I finally made the choice to not make resolutions but a couple goals, attainable things that wonโ€™t set me up for failure.

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  11. I think this is the reason why gyms are crowded in January but by the time Februrary comes along its pretty much empty in comparison (and also the reason why i try to set my goals in mid-July). Great post.

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  12. Oh my God. Finally somebody who hates the New Year! This is a beautiful post. You’re so right. Change doesn’t come from a new year’s resolution. It comes from the will power, which in turn comes from within, to practice the change everyday. This is amazing. (Un)Happy New Year to you, too? ๐Ÿ˜›

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  13. Completely agree with this post. And I’ll admit I sat here this morning and made a list of the things I hoped to achieve in 2018. However, no list, no disappointments. I think it’s best just to try and do what you can, and don’t put immense pressure on ‘yearly deadlines’.

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  14. Loved this, and pretty much for a lot of reasons others have already mentioned. I don’y believe in them, i do believe in life change. Call it in a goal that never ends because you can always strive to go past that point, like a video game just beating levels. You fall on your ass to get up and go to the next level. Congrats, loved the post

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  15. I am curious as to the origin of “afracturedfaithblog”. I have enjoyed reading the last several posts. As for New Year’s Resolutions…I don’t believe in them. I decided about 6 years ago to never lie to myself. God Bless.

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