I’m lying in bed. Not the most glamorous image to start your day I appreciate but bear with me. I’m still sore from the 20 mile run on Saturday. I’m also tired and I’m struggling to throw off the duvets and start another day. I’m off work (hurrah) but there is still so much to do. I’m scheduled to run a 10K (a so called recovery run meant to loosen me up after the 20 miler but right now it sounds like the death match from hell). My legs don’t want to propel me out of bed let alone out into the roads outside where I have to say it sounds a bit squally as I lie here typing.
I’m also working towards completing 10,000 words on the novel over the Easter break. I use the word ‘break’ in the loosest possible sense of the word. The first draft is currently sitting at around 80,000 words and is about two thirds complete. After that begins the hell of editing, proofing and worse still allowing a selected few to read it. I think I’m dreading that bit the worst. It’s akin to throwing your new born baby to a pack of starving, feral dogs. Sorry for the disturbing image but it is.
Oh did I forget to mention that I’m a father and husband. Old, selfish Stephen would have swept those trivial responsibilities under the carpet a few, short years ago. I tended to airbrush all that on my social media platforms as it was all about me after all, right? Well, no. They are my foundations upon which everything else is built. Without them the whole house of cards comes tumbling to the ground. Without them there is no running, there is no writing. Just me, broken and bloodied under the rubble of what used to be my life.
There are practical matters to attend to. Rebeca is going on a school trip to Scotland later this month so I need to venture up into the swirling vortex that is our roof space in search of a hold-all for her. It’s two weeks away but she wants to start packing now. Her mother has trained her well. If I’m not back in an hour call for Indiana Jones. No, on second thoughts, make that Lara Croft. The Angelina Jolie version, not that new girl. We watched Skull Island, the latest Kong movie, yesterday. I’m now frightened to venture into the roof space for the love of God.
There’s also the small matter of preparing for a meeting with the Education Authority later this week over proposed plans to close Hannah’s school; other issues regarding her still inadequate transport to and from school; trying to drag my lazy son out for a training session when he’d much rather spend his Easter holidays glued to his Play Station (because becoming a professional rugby player is just going to fall into his lap obviously); and the million and one household tasks that Fionnuala has quite rightly been asking me to carry out for only the last nine years or so.
To say we are a busy family is something of an understatement. You think my itinerary is nuts, then try checking out Fionnuala’s. It cray cray. But we keep going. Because there’s nothing else to do right? Well at least that’s how I deal with it all. I might not be the most talented writer or runner but one thing is for certain is that I won’t quit. Maybe I have my OCD and anxiety to thank for that. Mental health truly is a double edged sword. I’ve seen others with far greater ability than mine fall by the wayside. Why? Only they can answer that.
All I can say is that you shouldn’t give up. Not now and not ever. Don’t be that person sitting in their armchair aged eighty wondering ‘what if?’. Don’t be that person who gave in the doubting voices, most of all the voice in their own head. You’re not good enough, you’ll never get there and so on ad nauseum. Don’t be that person who got knocked down once too often and just lay there, refusing to get up. Get up! Get up for those who believe in you. And what’s more get up for those that didn’t believe in you.
So congratulations. You’ve got this far and you’re either thinking that Irish guy is a moron or maybe he’s got a point. If it’s the former then no hard feelings and thanks for making it this far. Close the door behind you on the way out. But if my Easter Monday rant has sown a seed in your mind then, well, what are you going to do about it? You have dreams, you have plans. Well how about today you take that first step towards making them a reality. Prove them all wrong. Prove yourself wrong. Start today. Join me. Make it happen.
So what are you going to do about it? What are your plans for the rest of 2018?
I admire your strong determination on both, your training and your novel. Your determination is contagious and motivates me. Thank you
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You’re welcome Lawrence. Thank you for all the support you provide.
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My pleasure, truly
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Thank you for liking and engaging with my post today, loving your blog, keep up the good work xx
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Thank you as well. Keep in touch 🙂
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It is a very busy week for me, in fact, has been busy weeks lately, I am covering for two fellow coworkers for a month and a half now… But it’s like a marathon, go one mile at a time… Have a great week!
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You too Alexandre. Don’t burn yourself out.
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Reblogged this on Life Can Get Messy and commented:
This post is sooo on point of what I needed today.
I love with an illness that over the last 10 years had taken my very busy life; as I knew it and makes it into an unrecognizable existence at times.
Life is too short and too uncertain to sit by and “watch the parade” I rather march in it !
Differently than I could – but still stubbornly not sitting on the side lines!
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Thank you. I’m glad my words have helped you today 🙂
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Congratulations with your novel! That’s so exciting. I know how you feel with the busy schedules, sometimes I forget to breathe! Like you said though, make it happen!
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Thank you. I hope to and also hope you will read it one day 🙂
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We plan, try to carry out those plans, and try not to get upset when life happens instead of the plans.😊 That’s what I do, anyway! We have a busy week in front of us as well. Hope all goes smoothly for your family.
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Yes your family life sounds as chaotic as ours. I hope it all goes well for you 🙏🏻
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Yes!!! Prioritizing is key, and I’m slowly working around that.
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I enjoy your blog…Please would you accept this award: Mystery Blogger Award! and participate when you can 🙂 https://renewingserenity.wordpress.com/2018/04/02/humbly-i-accept-the-mystery-blogger-award/
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I’m really honoured to be nominated by you. Thank you so much ❤️🙏🏻🙂
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God bless you!! ❤
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So glad you liked my post and led me to stumble across this. Gave me much needed motivation, going to wake up early and get a move on! Thank you
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You’re very welcome. Thank you for taking the time to drop by 🙂
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I’m guessing that a comment about the Irish rugby team surely not being that difficult to get into won’t be appreciated :p Good luck with the novel, I’m in a similar position, procrastinating from editing. I’ll get there eventually.
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Thank you. Still a better rugby team than England 😏
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My plans are to build my photography and art printing business. The best to you in your endeavors!
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And to you too Lynn 🙂
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A great reminder and a much-needed prod. Thank you. Why is it – do you suppose – that inertia is so VASTLY much more self-perpetuating than action?
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Because it requires nothing on our part. Thank you.
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You are very encouraging. Thank you for that. Calling mental illness a double-edge sword is the best way to describe it and I cannot agree with you more. Good luck with the novel. I hope your family has a wonderful Easter holiday.
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Thank you for reading and taking the time to comment. I appreciate it.
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Hahaha.. I loved this & I’m not sure why yet. Maybe because it sounds like the voices in my own head that I’ve been ignoring? I needed a good hearty smile on this drab, snowy Monday! Thanks 😉
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Glad I made you laugh. And never listen to those voices. They know nothing 🙂
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Congrats on the run ..yes you do need to let your body recover lots of water. So being said that it’s a busy week just remember to re fuel not only body but mind.
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Yes indeed. I’m not very good on the water front though 🙄
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Yeah a lot of aren’t I’m always pushing the water after my husband runs he doesn’t like water.
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I got my internship so I’m moving in two months and I managed to get my next semester all in online classes so I won’t be moving back home. I’m leaving the nest as scary as that is and my schedule looks extra terrifying like those lizard monster things from Skull Island! I seriously enjoyed the movie references by the way!!! My friend and I will be going to see Paul later this week but we need prayer for our budgets if they’re going to keep coming out with another great movie to watch every week 🙂 hope you had a Happy and Productive Easter brother 🙂
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My plan for the rest of 2018 is to get serious about studying and go back to college
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I hope you succeed in your plans 🙏🏻🙂
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Thank you 😀
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Bravo. I’m in awe reading about your running marathons. So inspiring.
Writing a book 📖 is also very admirable.
I’m home sick w the flu. Not fun. But I wouldn’t have found your blog otherwise.
Cheers to being a dad and husband. The most important jobs you will ever have.
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Thanks for visiting the blog Teri and your kind words. I hope you’re feeling better soon.
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Thank you. Much better now. 😊
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For the first time Stephen i cannot answer either of those questions……..
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