I Do Good Foot Rubs. But Very Little Else.

I often ask Fionnuala if I’m the most irritating person she has ever met to which she unerringly replies….yes. It’s a gift, I guess, but my long suffering wife has many buttons of which I know how to press every one. Repeatedly. If there is a new, innovative way to drive her nuts yours truly will somehow manage to unearth it; and serve it up with fries and a side salad. Et voila.

I know what a pain I am. I’m beyond socially awkward and if there is an illogical, baffling way to carry out an activity then I will find it. I’m impractical beyond belief, frequently live with my head in the clouds and invariably oblivious to the bedlam in our home as Fionnuala battles to raise three kids, a man child and keep the house in some semblance of order.

She is utterly selfless and without fail puts the needs of others before herself. She has that rarest of combinations; streetwise yet with a heart of gold. She would do anything for her friends and family and has made umpteen sacrifices down the years that I could fill a thousand blogs with. I have no idea why she puts up with me and yet she still does. For that I will never be able to repay her.

She is one of the main reasons I believe there is a God up there. A God who obviously rolled his eyes, took pity on me and sent Fionnuala to sort out my various messes. From my excruciating dad rapping to my bewildering shirt ironing technique; from my inability to operate the oven properly to my endless whining about my work, my running and ‘the book’. She sighs, she swears, she tears out her hair. But she puts up with me.

Tonight I gave my wife a foot rub on the sofa as she binged on one of her favourite U.S. drama series. Fionnuala has to take extra care of her feet following a diagnosis of Type 2 Diabetes. That aside, she is a busy mummy who spends most of the day on her feet. She deserves a little pampering now and again; in fact, forget that, she deserves a lot more pampering than I provide her with. But tonight I put down the laptop, set aside Kirkwood Scott for half an hour and exercised my magic fingers.

I don’t know much but what I do know, I do well. And I do know I give foot rubs. It’s not a five course dinner, it’s not cleaning the house from top to bottom, but it was my practical way of thanking my wife for all she does for me and showing that I love her very much. It’s all very well telling someone you love them but that’s not enough. You have to show it. Love is more than an emotion. It is an act of will, it is persevering with your loved one through the bad times as well as the good.

Before the night is over, before you have even read this I will no doubt have put my foot in it again and committed some calamitous act that will have Fionnuala crawling up the walls. I will bow my head and start the walk of shame back to the dog kennel where I spend a good part of my week. Charlie the border terrier will look at it me with some disdain before reluctantly moving over to let me join him for the night.

Do you drive your loved ones insane?

How do you show people you love them?

Published by Fractured Faith Blog

We are Stephen and Fionnuala and this is our story. We live in Northern Ireland, have been married for 17 years and have three kids - Adam, Hannah and Rebecca. We hope that our story will inspire and encourage others. We have walked a rocky road yet here we are today, together and stronger than ever. We are far from perfect and our faith has been battered and bruised. But an untested faith is a pointless faith. Just as a fractured faith is better than none at all. We hope you enjoy the blog.

46 thoughts on “I Do Good Foot Rubs. But Very Little Else.

  1. You give good foot rubs? I need good foot rubs. Long story short, my arches need pretty much constant support or else I will be in pain 😫
    I still can’t deal with running, standing too long, or much high impact stuff, but life goes on, lol!
    My family and I are just too weird together to drive each other insane. Our constant obscure quotes, inside jokes, movie references, weird voices, and pretending that our pets can talk might drive others up the wall. Our conversations might also be hard to follow. But that may be what comes of being a homeschool family!
    I’m sure you are not as absolutely inept as you claim! Give yourself a little credit 😂

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Frankly, I adore the humorous way you look at so many things. And I love reading about you and Fionnuala (she has such a great name!). I drive my husband crazy by telling him, in detail, about what went on at work. He listens so patiently – most of the time. I show people I love them by cooking for them. I’m pretty good at it! – Angie

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I think I ask my husband at least once a day if he still loves me. I know that he does but there is always an insecure part that thinks “Am I really lovable? Do I deserve this awesome amazing man who makes me laugh every day?” Your wife loves you because you are amazing and you do things that make her feel good and feel loved. Stop beating yourself up!!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. that last part about the dog…ha ha ha!! I am beyond ticklish and a foot rub from my husband will get him kicked in the nose. But a back rub would be nice. LOL.

    I’m beyond annoying too, but so is he. That’s why we are equal. And his family is extremely annoying from listening to flat earthers to conspiracy theories on 9/11 to chem trails that are polluting us as we speak. It’s a giant eye roll all around on my end. Thankfully my husband disagrees with 99.9% of what his family thinks otherwise we’d be divorced.

    Lucky for him, I rarely speak to my family which is of my own choosing. He doesn’t have to put up with much on my end, except for me–which is more than enough for anyone. I annoy myself a lot most days. I can rarely live with me. But, here we are–two imperfect, annoying people. My dog doesn’t think I’m annoying though, so that’s good, right?

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I make my husband soup. He is also type 2 diabetic and he won’t eat anything green, other than peas. I make red soup and green soup, known as ‘pea soup’ and ‘tomato soup’ – ’nuff said. He loves tomato soup.


      1. Well as long as you didn’t spit it out … you wouldn’t want little bit of coconut splattered over your screen, or carpet for that matter. I like those pink foam shrimps … do you remember them? Yum.


              1. The letter writing will begin tomorrow morning when husband dearest has gone to work and I have nothing but peace, quiet and a large cup of coffee. Of course I have the blog to do … Anxiety and Followers I think you suggested. And when I admit to wanting zillions of followers like you, promise me that you won’t tell me to have patience. I don’t have patience! Are you being impatient in waiting for a letter? Do I sense a shared trait, a similarity?


                1. Yes I’m looking forward to your blog. I’m not the most patient person at times but it depends upon what the circumstances are. Your blog is growing steadily. I’m impatient about the book I’m writing. It seems further away than ever the more work I put into it. I need a month in a locked room to finish it 😞

                  Liked by 1 person

                  1. Blog done … think it might be more of a rant. I know what you mean about the locked room, that’s part of the reason why I’m so looking forward to my trip. I shall have no other responsibilities and can focus on cycling, putting up my tent and writing. It can be frustrating, but imagine the day when you can give up your day job and have a wonderful summerhouse at the bottom of the garden with a No Entry sign on the door and you can just write, write, write all day. How wonderful that will be. Keep on plugging away at it. 😘


                    1. I’ll be waiting at the madhouse for you and we’ll be fed ice cream and ginger nuts – peace and quiet to just write all day. Keep going, you’re doing so well … imagine you’ve reached the 16 mile point in your marathon and it’s an uphill bit and you’re running out of puff. “This too shall pass” and where there’s a hill, there’s always some easy free-wheeling to follow. K


                    2. My husband calls me ‘rangy’, short for orangutan as in … ginger. I have since dyed my hair very pale blonde to remove any traces of what I had thought was a pretty strawberry blonde. Apparently not. We both rather like the new look. I have never had a coconut mushroom! Are they squishy? I like squishy sweets.


                    3. Yes, they are squishy. Google them. I always get them for birthdays, Father’s Day and other special occasions. The Colonel is a true gentleman 😂 I hope your arms don’t reach your knees that’s all I can say.

                      Liked by 1 person

  6. Yes, I drive my family nuts! I have OCD and they just do not understand it. Often times, this results in friction among all five of us. To show that I care, J- finds his lunch in the fridge each morning when he wakes up for work. The girls pick the movies, even if I do not like it, I still watch it.


      1. All bath towels must be folded a certain way. If not, the entire closet has to be emptied and refolded. All can goods must be faced. The labels have to be turned forward. The kitchen counters must be washed a dozen times a day and the floor has to be swept constantly. And their beds have to be made every morning or my mind starts to spin like crazy! And this is a short list.


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