Why I Need To Start Reading My Bible Again

I’m as blind as a bat. Seriously. Since I was nine, I’ve had to wear glasses. I remember the first day they were unveiled to the ahem….watching world in Mrs. Robinson’s P5 class. I broke down in tears as the entire class turned as one to gawk at my oh so stylish National Health Service jam jars with equally appalling brown plastic rims. So began a life consigned to permanent face furniture.

I’ve tried contact lenses a couple of times but they aren’t for me. I’d rather stick red hot knitting needles in my eyeballs. Come to think of it, putting in lenses was a not dissimilar experience. When finally in, the tears rolled down my cheeks and my irises resembled maps of the London Underground, criss crossed with an array of broken capillaries. I resembled a vampire in the midst of a particularly bad reaction to sunlight.

My glasses are, therefore, a necessary evil. Without them I can’t drive, read or run. The only time I take them off is when I go to bed at night. I simply cannot function without them, I could not step out the front door, without falling flat on my face. It’s a no brainer that I go nowhere without them firmly attached to my ears. The alternative is unthinkable. They are as part of me, as the nose on my face.

I cannot see without them.

We were visited by friends on Sunday. One of them left her glasses case behind. Thankfully, it was empty. Before leaving, she talked to us about her faith and plans she had for the future , plans she believes God spoke to her about. It was exciting to hear and sparked a flame within me which had been dormant for many months, if not years. A spark which reignited a very battered, fractured faith.

I picked up my Bible yesterday, inspired by the words of this friend. All day I hadn’t been able to get the image of the discarded glasses case out of my head. I thought of my Bible which had lain discarded in the bookcase in our living room for longer than I care to remember. I used to read it every day until life got in the way. The ways of the world took precedence over the ways of God. I was blinded by anger, resentment and self.

I found the verse below, and realised how spiritually blind I have been. I realised how much I need my Bible, as much as I need my glasses. Without its words of truth, I stumble around in an abyss of sinful, addictive behaviour. I allow other voices in my head to drown out the voices that matter. The voices of my loved ones, the voice of God. I realised that I need my Bible. I need it’s guidance. I need Jesus.

He is the antidote for I have become toxic, poisoned by the ways of the world and the voice which has spoken untruth after untruth, layer after layer, clogging my arteries and hardening my heart; forming milky cataracts over my eyes which have blinded me from what really matters. I need the Bible more than I need the happy pill I take every day to inhibit the serotonin levels raging uncontrollably across my synapses.

These are mere words, and are meaningless without accompanying action. But it’s a start and, at present, it’s all I have. This my Declaration of Independence, my call to arms, my battle cry. I’m determined to get back to regular Bible study and reflection. It’s time to get back in the saddle and focus on those who matter. It’s time to open my eyes to the light again, to reclaim the 20/20 vision I so desperately need.

Psalm 119:18 – ‘Open my eyes that I may see wonderful things in your law.’

How is your faith journey today?

How important is the Bible in your life?

Has it always been that way?

Published by Fractured Faith Blog

We are Stephen and Fionnuala and this is our story. We live in Northern Ireland, have been married for 17 years and have three kids - Adam, Hannah and Rebecca. We hope that our story will inspire and encourage others. We have walked a rocky road yet here we are today, together and stronger than ever. We are far from perfect and our faith has been battered and bruised. But an untested faith is a pointless faith. Just as a fractured faith is better than none at all. We hope you enjoy the blog.

90 thoughts on “Why I Need To Start Reading My Bible Again

  1. Wow I really enjoyed reading this! I am not a Christian but I used to read my scriptures everyday but as you said life took precedence over the God’s way. May be I need to read some divine verses to correct my near-sightedness, as strange as it sounds my eye sight is fine but I get blind on stairs. I can’t see on stairs and always miss steps, it’s scary!

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Wow I’m glad you’ve returned to the Bible. It takes time and I admire you sharing this battle you’ve had with the world and the Bible. It reveals our own personal struggles. I laugh when you talked about your glass and contact lens. I have contact lens too and I stop wearing them because my eyes would get blurry and itchy the next day. Plus it’s a nuisance when you have to put them in and take them off everyday. Lol! Great post! 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Great analogy, loved reading this!

    Reminds me of the song Reckless Love and the meaning behind it, how God will search us out no matter where we are in our faith…even a fractured faith:)
    Below is a link to the video:

    Liked by 3 people

    1. That song and the testimony just brought up tears… Thanks for sharing alimw!

      Look what you started Stephen!

      God wants nothing less than for us all to be thriving under His care and direction and WE are His conduits to carry out that mission. Grateful for your blog AND commenters

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes that song gives me goosebumps and tears…every time…I know some who don’t like the song because they feel like the word reckless is describing a reckless or careless God but I look at it like in ALL of my mess when I was running from God He was right there with me trying to get me to see Him while I was being reckless..like He’s righteously reckless and will do everything and go anywhere possible to get us, but in a Holy “reckless” way…it’s pretty incredible

        Liked by 3 people

  4. I like this Stephen! To answer your question, my bible is very important to me. It hasn’t always been this way. I decided to be intentional about it when I realised that I felt better, happier and more productive whenever I spent time with God. I struggled a great deal when I was bound to people’s method of bible study. I couldn’t and still can’t do mornings for many reasons. However, when my kids are settled in bed, I try to spend time with God. I am so happy you have picked the bible up again. Blessings to you!

    Liked by 3 people

  5. I was delighted to read you post this morning. I have much in common with your faith journey. Although it’s been difficult to do the ‘church’ thing, I have many friends who’ve been there along the way, helping me build a relationship with the part of the Bible in red letters, to have a relationships with Jesus. It’s transformed how I deal with life and given me a new set of glasses in which to see my world. I know longer believe that the Bible is a ‘how to’ or answer book. I find it creates many more questions that I think about, pray about, and eventually find a way to become a better human being loving others. Keep up the great wok! I love your posts.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Great post.

    My moment of coming face to face with God occurred when I was 35. I’d just started dating Julie, and she asked me if I believed in God. My response was a pretty safe, “I believe there’s something that can be called God.” she also asked if I’d ever read the bible. I was raised a Catholic, and those around me basically said the common man was to stupid to understand what it was saying. I approached my priest with it, and he encouraged me to sit down and read it (in fact he gave me my first Bible). I read it, and walked away thinking of it as good history, good poetry, but life changing (not in a million years).

    So here I am, almost twenty years later, fresh back from a war. Mentally, I was a mess, and I’ve got the Wiley Coyote look on my face that proclaimed to the world that I was falling and when I hot bottom, this was going to hurt. I was working as a deputy sheriff for a Sheriff that I’d trained when he was a rookie, and that told me that my career was over.

    so, Julie gave me and old, battered, Gideon Bible, and told me to try again, only this time, to ask God to reveal himself in the words.

    so, I did. I triple dog dared God to show up.

    I was a quiet night at the Sheriff’s office, and I was working dispatch. I was in Job when I saw something that rocked my world. In Job 26:7 said God made the world, and hung it on nothing. The minute I read that, I slammed on the breaks so to speak, backed up, and had to go over it again.

    Now my degree is in of all things Astro-Physics, and I’m very well versed in fact and theory when it comes to stuff in the sky. But when I read that, all of a sudden I saw God peeking out between the words. Let me explain. When I read that the first thing I thought of was those world changing pictures from Apollo 8, of the Earth rising above the desolate Lunar landscape, and there’s no strings holding it in place. In job, I saw something that they don’t know yet. in fact if you asked back then, the most advanced model of the Universe said our world was being carried around on the back of turtle which in turn was on the back of another turtle, and so on.

    Men hadn’t seen this amazing vision yet. So where did this knowledge come from? I’ve never given much credence to the Ancient Astronauts theory, and a rather doubted little green men showed it to humans. And Moon Rockets were in rather short supply back then.

    That left me with only one conclusion. God had shown it.

    so on a quiet night, at the end of my career, I ran into God. I’ve never turned back since.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. What a great testimony William. Thank you for sharing it with us all. Yes, I’ve heard that many ‘new’ scientific discoveries about the creation of the universe can be cross referenced to passages in Job. Mind blowing stuff!


  7. Thank you for sharing! An important part of my faith journey has been in being mindful that God is with me always, every day, walking with me through both struggles and celebrations. My prayers have been that He will open my eyes, my ears, my heart to Him and He does that… through daily conversation with Him (and He’s heard it all!), listening and being still, studying the Bible, and sharing with and being encouraged by others on the same journey. I’m praying for you and your family as you continue your walk.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I may be biased but this is one of your most beautiful and life inspiring posts of late. All of your journey whether filled with the Spirit or spent window shopping the never-ending supply of the worlds candy markets, it is your testimony… and in the End it is His testimony also.

    Every prophet, disciple, apostle, every man called by God goes through the same stages. It is those dry seasons in the desert that make our experience and journey and joy in the Lord so much more complete. Every time we turn once again as parched men realizing Living Water has been within our reach all along, we are returning to the One who loved us first.

    Men are forgetful, we are stubborn and prideful. Not to inappropriately destroy the sentiment I’m expressing here, but I’m reminded of make-up sex, to be rejoined at the soul level with someone we drifted apart from and realize they still love us as much as they ever had. To know we didn’t screw things up in our seasons in the valley of the shadow of death is a beautiful thing.

    Repentance and recommitment spark a new hunger and thirst that draws us closer every time we pass through thise turnstiles, and none of it surprises God. (Peter you will deny me 3 times…)

    Fan the spark brother, a forest fire awaits.

    Liked by 3 people

  9. I’m happy for you that the Bible is helpful. You will still need your happy pill and your glasses, tho. Reading the Bible does not help me. It damaged me. (My folks were bibleholics). I look for inspiration from lots of places. And the Verse you quoted was a Good One. Thank you.


  10. Steven, I was ten years old when my eyes went bad and I was introduced to the only style of glasses for boys: square framed and black. This provided additional ammo for the bullies I endured through those early years.
    As a pastor, I am thrilled to hear of your commitment to reading the bible. God’s Word, as I believe it to be, is extremely important to me. Having said that, this is the first year in many that I have committed to read it in its entirety again. I used the rationale (excuse) that I was reading it everyday as I prepared sermons and bible studies, so I didn’t need to read it all. Though it was true that I was in God’s word most days, I was denying myself that quiet time away with God that comes from reading the bible each day.
    I have had no trouble sticking to my reading plan this year, but that has not always been the case. I would like (and could use) some accountability partners in this. If you’re interested, please let me know.
    As always, your writings bless and challenge me. Please know that you and your family are often in my prayers as is your novel.


    Liked by 3 people

  11. This is absolutely beautiful and a clarion call to all who are living with a “fractured faith” – like myself. I was drawn to your blog because of its name. I have continued reading your posts because they move me – and this one in particular. I continue to struggle, but thankfully God is faithful, even when I am not. Wishing you many blessings…and thank you!

    Liked by 2 people

  12. “Without its words of truth, I stumble around in an abyss of sinful, addictive behaviour.” I hear that brother!

    My faith has undergone a dramatic overhaul these past two years. I barely recognize who I am from who I used to be. When I once could barely handle a few verses a day, intermittently, I can now stay (mostly) on track with my 2 year reading plan, and sometimes even more!

    As you restart, I encourage you to take it slow and steady. Allow your appetite time to ramp up.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. I was thrilled to read your testimony of the word. The bible is my daily bread. I need it, God’s words to me, for daily strength. I am excited for you. Don’t let anything stop you. God has so much to tell each of us if we will only spend the time with Him.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. I have also downloaded the entire Bible from Faith Comes By Hearing, so I can listen to the Word of God, when awful things are on the news, or I am washing dishes, just whenever! Thanks for sharing your story!


  15. I was brought up in a Christian home, and was ‘saved’ when I was 8 years old. Man,. that’s 44 years ago! I’ve spent hours at church, in Sunday School, Bible Class. Bible Study . . . over the years. not so much recently. I think I have 3 bibles at home, none of which I touch from one Sunday to the other. I read the Daily verses that pop into my inbox every morning, but that is about it.

    i go to church most Sundays, and I contribute now and again, but – at the moment – i think my spiritual life is rather like an old beat-up Morris Minor with four flat tires, bouncing along a rustic B road. It’s been a long time since I was a dual carriageway, never mind a three or four-lane highway.

    I’m not boasting, just telling it like it is. I think I’m scared to do anything about it. The “What if . . .” syndrome.

    Your words are a stark reminder of where I am, and where I should be. Thank you.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Praise the Lord for His guidance. It is often in times of blindness, I think when we finally see we also hear Him the clearest. There are no other distractions. I will share this on the community spotlight for October. May it speak to others.


  17. I grew up in church. All my life I was exposed to the Gospel. But it didn’t truly become real to me until these past couple of years. After I had a seizure and broke my collarbone, I had a lot of time on my hands and it was then that I realized my need for God. He had been trying to get my attention and boy did he ever grab it!

    Thanks for sharing this. It was so great to read!


  18. I was raised in a “conservative” christian church. But my mom didn’t go, my dad was dead. I went to play volleyball with my friends and hear the book of Mark read by a college student. I liked the sense of family I was missing at home. I also saw GOD as my forever Father that I found missing in my life as well. John 14:6 states that “Jesus is the way, the truth and the light. No one gets to the Father except thru Him”. This verse told me that if I wanted a forever Father and a forever family I was going to have to go thru Jesus to get it. Well, I believed it and was baptized on my 16 birthday.

    On my 18 birthday I got a job working my way thru college at a local “bikini bar” it should rather have been called the “bikini bottoms bar” because as a bartender I was topless. When some of the people in my church started coming to the bar and “chit-chatting” me up. I was horrified. Just because I was standing in front of them with no shirt on in a context where it was appropriate to be so, they assumed that I was looking to have sex with whomever stepped up to the bar and asked. And since they KNEW me since I was 16 years old, they just figured since I was of age now and had perhaps led a sheltered life they offered to teach me the ways of love. Hmpf. I stopped going to church. Now, that I left Texas and moved to Alaska to become a writer I do not work in that kind of job and my reputation has not followed me. I have started once a month to attend a mesianic christian church. Jews that believe in Jesus. I like the small 40 member congregation and how we eat a meal every Saturday. Yep, Sabbath Saturdays. Which I like cuz I can go to church on Sat then club at night and sleep late on Sunday!!! Anyways, I have been reading my bible more and mostly to repair and restore confidence in myself and find peace.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Another brilliant post . . . and I can relate to the glasses. 🙂 I’ve been going through some challenges on the faith and Bible front for a while now. When people say God speaks to them, I am so envious. I wish He would speak to me and tell me which direction to take (as I’m feeling so very lost at times). Hopefully–God willing–I will return to the fold soon.


  20. This is such a blessing to read! We don’t realize how nourishing the Bible is until we stop reading or should I say, start reading it again 🙂 When I was taking care of my Mom in rehab back in July, I wasn’t able. It wae too hectic, too many interruptions, just too much everything. All excuses of course, no matter how i justify it. I kid you not in those months, oh my goodness, it was like I was rotting! I was becoming angry, discouraged, anything negative you can think of. It uas been such a relief to get back to my Bible reading. I say again, this post is a blessing to read 🙂


      1. Thats kind of you to say. It’s always a pleasure talking with you 🙂 it’s been a challenge to keep up with everyone. Life has been full of adventures. Some good, others not. One thing after another all year. I followed you AGAIN. I noticed there were only 4 blogs showing up in my reader for a few days, and thought did everyone take a break all at once? Haha nope, same issue I’ve had from the beginning, wordpress dropping people off my list. I’ve spent most of my free day re-following blogs, and catching up reading them.

        Liked by 1 person

  21. I’ve been guilty of reading other books over the Bible lately. They’re good, helpful books, but the Bible should be my main source of encouragement and wisdom! My daughter just got glasses and so far she loves them! I think they’ve worked hard to give kids more options on styles these days. 🙂


      1. Yes, I’m working on getting back into it, although I don’t have anything structured yet, which would probably be best for me.


  22. I just discovered your blog today! Great article–and wonder how you’re doing with your renewed commitment to read, seven months later. My shattered faith has been super-charged by a decision three years ago to memorize chapters and books of the Bible. I’ve blogged about it off and on since then, and recently began a series on Hebrews, the longest book I’ve memorized so far. Please check it out if it piques your interest! I’m planning to dig into your other posts, too.


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