I’ve been very quite for a while on the blog I’ve been processing a lot of things that have been going on and trying to come to terms with other people’s actions and behaviour towards me. It has took me a good 6 months to try and move forward it hasn’t been easy but I’ve got through it with the love and support of my family who are the most important people in my life.
Yesterday we heard the news of a UK TV personality who sadly took her own life. She had been bullied, trolled online and received so much abuse from the media and social media platforms the poor girl felt she had no other option. Society today needs to wise up and stop with the bullying, body shaming and judging people, nobody is perfect in this world. Just because you are typing something online or saying something behind their back and not saying it to their face doesn’t make your actions any different.
Words hurt and that’s a fact. Nasty words spoken to you take root inside you that is so hard to remove. They love to tell you what a failure you are and how worthless your life is until you can’t take much more. You might as well have physically stabbed them.
I’ve been there a few times in my life and have thought that it was the only way out but believe me it is not. It was through the love and support of my husband and my children that I am here today.
So yes words do hurt but they can also uplift you and make everything you are going through feel a little less of a burden.
Before you make that nasty remark, or break someone’s confidence and gossip about them behind their back remember this, which is a saying I was brought up on:
IF YOU HAVE NOTHING NICE TO SAY, SAY NOTHING AT ALL
It is so much easier to show love and spread love than it is to be cruel, mean and heartless.
Fionnuala
Black Thoughts 
You are a beautiful woman with a lovely spirit, Fionnaula. Thank you for writing this ❤️
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well spoken. Not sure how we got to the place where so many adults feel the need to put others down in order to elevate themselves.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Beautifully said, Fionnaula. 💞This is part of the reason I stay away from all the larger social media platforms and stick to this beautiful bloggy land of ours. Trolling and bullying are so horrible- if only the perpetrators could see their way through the mud of their lives in order to foresee the potential consequences. xx 😢
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well said. It is so hard. I know. Been there. Keep going. We are with you ❤️
LikeLiked by 1 person
Amen! Sticks n stones is bullshit. Mental health is real.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Love this! So very true.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I completely agree.
I have experienced this.
Word. 🌻
LikeLiked by 1 person
Some people can be so brutal towards others. They specialize in cruelty!
I agree with you, if you cannot say something nice, then just don’t say anything at all!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sadly this is so true. I attempt, with varying degrees of success, to follow advice I was given some 29 years ago: Don’t react/speak in response to my first thought. Take a second to consider what I am going to do/say next. It’s surprising how many times that time-delay has saved me from doing the very thing you have written about today.
My prayer for you is that God continues to draw you in and comfort you with His unending love!
Chuck
LikeLiked by 1 person
So sorry that people have done this. Each of us is unique and special. Words do hurt and people who use them to pummel someone need to be stopped. I have also let words push me down. Now, at my age, I am better at pushing them away but the scars are still there.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes! Words hurt very much indeed. We (friends) have been dealing with that too. Bullying and libel…. it kills the spirit. I’m glad you are recovering and have support. 💕❤️💕❤️💕
LikeLiked by 1 person
My earliest years in childhood, I was met with hateful words and actions from within my own family. This betrayal caused the largest amount of damage and wounded me the most. It continued in high school by a pack of mean girls. Then as a adult, I was shunned as a single impoverished mom in an affluent community of married couples. . .
I am so sorry you are going through this. The haters will continue to hate but please believe there is nothing wrong with you. The problem lies within them.
Someday, you will come out of this stronger than you were before. 🌻
LikeLiked by 2 people
We must learn to be more compassionate and loving online but what we really all should regularly do is turn the judgement inwards – where does this hatred and cruelness to others come from??
Love one another 💝
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is so well written and you’re so great! It’s such a shame that we live in a society that feels the need to tear people down at their lowest
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for sharing this. It cannot be said too often. I remember my 3rd grade teacher saying “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me.” Gawd, was she ever wrong. Hurtful words are weapons.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for these important thoughts. They’re well said. I think that people can be very clueless to how much power our words carry. Especially when it comes to the internet, people feel emboldened to speak out harshly because they can’t see another human at the end of their words … they think they are just attacking ideas and that they can say whatever you want. I’ve also been giving thoughts to things I’ve said that weren’t necessarily mean-spirited but yet were unsolicited opinions that may have left long-lasting stings in the hearts of others. I am reading a book by Lysa Terkeurst called “Uninvited” and it is giving me fresh perspectives on fighting through the rejections that I experience in life, especially from the words and judgments of others. I pray that you continue to find healing from the situations you mention in the opening. Peace …
LikeLiked by 2 people
We need to make the voice of love and compassion stronger that those of hate and fear. Humans are a strange species; we all hurt and we all need love, yet we don’t all seek it in the same way for fear of rejection (or because we have experience rejection so often). Social media has given a voice to so many, and so many choose to expose their vulnerability in cruel and hurtful ways. We need to fight back with love; choose to display our vulnerability in positive ways and reach out the arm of support so that no one is left behind; no one is isolated and no one is rejected. Only then, will we silence hate. I am sorry you have been hurt in the past – it’s not OK, but your voice of positivity in the world is bringing about a healing vibration.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for your kind words 🙂
LikeLike
This breaks my heart. Working in a middle school makes me intimately aware of the devastation social media can cause. What makes it tragic is that it is so unnecessary, and the person who promotes this caustic behavior has a whole in their heart and it is not being healed either. Thank you for this post. Unfortunately, the people who read a blog as lovely as yours are not the ones who need to hear this message. We are all capable of inflicting pain, even if it is inadvertent, so this post will give me pause, and that is good. Blessings to you. Regina
LikeLiked by 2 people
You’re very welcome. Thank you. I’m glad you could relate to the post.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I am so so sorry for the cruel words that have hurt you, Fionnuala. 💔 I pray you continue to find peace. People think that hiding behind a keyboard gives them the right to unlimited power; in reality they are still just as much the elementary bullies they were as children, and they are still just as wrong. Cruelty should never be excused. Words should be used to breathe life and hope into one another; they should never be used to end it. You are a beautiful and strong woman, and I hope you know how much we know how proud Stephen is of you, and how much he loves you. It shines through with a brilliance every time he writes your name.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well said Fionnaula. Good to hear from you again. 🙂
LikeLike
I’m so sorry people were so hideous to you, Fionnuala. Believe me, I know how it feels because I was relentlessly bullied for six long years and it vexed my very soul. Know that you’re not to blame and people who feel they most tear others down can’t be happy in their own lives.
Wishing you nothing but peace, love and happiness!
Cherie
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you Cherie
LikeLiked by 1 person
I know right. Social Media has its own share of pros and cons. We all invest a huge part of our life on social media. Let’s strive to make it a better place for everyone. Well penned. More power to you.
LikeLike
I agree. Thank you for understanding 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person