The 12 Blogging Questions Of Christmas – Day 9 – What Last Minute Shopping Are You Doing?

Fionnuala is super organised when it comes to Christmas. When it comes to most matters, really. But it’s inevitable there are always a few last minute purchases to be made on Christmas Eve. Today was no exception. I was dispatched to source Christmas crackers. There was no joy in our village shop, which resembled the American evacuation of Hanoi. It was akin to one of those supermarket scenes you see in zombie movies. Every man, woman and child for themselves.

Onwards to the next village. When I asked the shop assistant if they stocked crackers she stared at me blankly until I clarified ‘Christmas, as opposed to the edible variety.’ She giggled, before cheerily announcing they were sold out, and directing me to an even tinier shop on the outskirts of the village. So tiny, that I thought it had closed down years ago. I often run past it, and it rarely shows any signs of life. But desperate times call for desperate measures.

Shop Number Three most accurately resembled a shack, opposite an equally derelict petrol station. Parking outside it, I half expected to be greeted by a grizzled hillbilly bearing a double barrelled shotgun. ‘We don’t get many strangers round these parts’, prior to yours truly disappearing and my body never being found. So I was semi relieved to be greeted by a pleasant middle aged lady when I entered. Not a skin mask to be seen.

Relief soon turned to disappointment, however, as she informed me that, lo and behold, they had also sold out of Christmas crackers. I returned home empty handed. I don’t even like them anyway. Who needs toe curling jokes and cheap, plastic toys? The paper hats never fit my meaty head and invariably rip, leaning me looking stupider than ever. Plus they leave a mess and I’m usually the one who has to clear up after the kids. Bah humbug, I say.

What last minute Christmas item are you running around after today?

What Christmas ‘necessity’ could you live without?

Flash Fiction Challenge

Feeling a little creative today? Well let your fingers do the talking then. A few weeks ago I told you of my interest (some might call it weird fascination) with discarded till receipts in shops. I would look at them and then imagine the life of the person who had made the relevant purchase. What sort of day were they having? Where were they headed? And with who? To do what?

The last challenge provoked some great pieces of writing and I hope todays will as well. Apologies for the tatty receipt. It has been living the back pocket of my jeans for a few days now. I know. Gross. But for those struggling to read it the person in question bought:

  • 1 packet of Fox’s Glacier Mints
  • 24 pack of Diet Coke (cans)
  • £20 of diesel (gasoline)
  • Hmmmmm. Interesting. Looks like someone was planning a road trip. And a man or woman after my own heart regarding their love of Diet Coke. And as for the mints? Well, somebody wanted to freshen up their breath for some reason. The plot thickens? Have I got your creative juices flowing? Are you up for the challenge. There are no rules. All I ask is you give this blog a shout out in your related post.
  • Your pieces can be as long or short as you want and I’ll reblog the best ones. Let me know what you think. Happy writing!
  • Are you up for today’s flash fiction challenge?
  • The Tesco check-out

    The Tesco check-out

    https://everythingblog333.wordpress.com/2018/07/22/the-tesco-check-out/
    — Read on everythingblog333.wordpress.com/2018/07/22/the-tesco-check-out/

    Today’s Flash fiction reblog is special for a number of reasons. Firstly it’s from the other side of the world, Australia. The land of kangaroos, didgeridoos and er…..boomerangoos? Secondly it inspired a blogger who hadn’t written in some time to put metaphorical pen to paper. Thirdly it’s just great writing. We have all stood in a store and compared our own less than perfect lives to the ‘beautiful people’ in the next aisle.

    Flash Fiction Challenge

    So there I was at the self service check-out yesterday purchasing my body weight in Diet Coke and waiting for the receipt. I refuse to walk out of the store without it for fear that the long arm of the law will collar me, accuse me of theft and I’ll be hauled off to the nearest police cell quicker than you can shout ‘But honestly officer. The receipt is sitting on the counter if you’ll only just let me……AAAARGHHHH……… those handcuffs really chafe!’

    As the check-out spewed forth said proof of purchase I noticed that not all of my fellow customers were as paranoid as yours truly. There were half a dozen discarded receipts lying in front of me. It struck me. I wonder who made these varied purchases and then wandered out of the store back to the trials and tribulations of their everyday lives? What kind of days were they having? What kind of lives?

    I am an avid people watcher. It must go hand in hand with commuting to and from work every day. When I was on Twitter, back in the day, I ran a daily series called ‘Train Tweets’ where I created imaginary lives for the regulars who shared the 7:13 express to Belfast with me. I was the original geek on a train until Hollywood turned me into Emily Blunt. Serial killers, angry solicitors and Arsene Wenger lookalikes. We had it all on the 7:13.

    Earlier this week I was educated as to what ‘flash fiction’ is. A light bulb popped on in my head as I realised I write a lot about writing fiction on the blog but don’t actually write a lot of fiction on the blog. Did that last sentence make sense? I sincerely hope so. For otherwise you might struggle with the rest of this post. Which would be a terrible shame for everyone concerned. Most of all me. But also for all you lot.

    Because….

    I have a challenge for you all. Should you choose to accept it, in true Mission Impossible style. Below are two of the receipts that I ‘borrowed’ from the Tesco empire. All you have do is write a piece of prose describing a day in the life of the person who made the purchase. Oh….and post it on WordPress. If this takes off then I will run it on the blog as an occasional feature. If not, then I will probably sulk for a day or two but then forgive you all and we can awkwardly agree that this was a terrible idea that should never have seen the light of day in the first place.

    Over to you now. Gauntlet thrown. If you choose to accept the challenge then feel free to name check fracturedfaithblog on your accompanying post. If not, then at least leave a comment and say hello. We can talk about the weather. Or maybe the extortionate £2:50 that Tesco charge for a coffee. And what’s a San Pellegino anyway? I had to Google it. Sparkling mineral water apparently. Hmmmmm. Somebody must have had a sore head.

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